As a coach, the AFL industry can be brutal.
The honest conversations, tough decisions and direct feedback all encompass how challenging being a senior figure in professional sport is.
After 25 years of working in one of the most competitive environments imaginable, Essendon forwards coach Dale Tapping thought he had experienced the toughest of talks.
But after being diagnosed with Myeloma, a blood cancer of bone marrow plasma cells, Tapping would face the hardest conversation he’s ever had.
After being told the devastating news, the 58-year-old now faced the prospect of having to break his illness to his children, Summer and Mason.
Reflecting on then moment where he sought balance between what the extent of his illness meant and telling his children the news first, Tapping said it was easily the most challenging moment of his life.
“Talking to them, that’d be the hardest conversation I’ve ever had to have,” Tapping told Essendon FC’s One on One podcast.
“Talking to them was really difficult and sharing that (news) because I didn’t have all the information. My young fella, he didn’t say a word for about three hours, he just sort of went off to his room and then he came out… sat on the couch, next to us.
“My daughter, Summer, was a lot more outwardly emotional because she was all over it. She knew what that meant to a certain point.”
Despite the raw emotions of such a conversation, it was decision which paid off for Tapping.
Mere days after being diagnosed with Myeloma, Tapping would start to be inundated with concerned calls for his welfare as news broke across friends and family afar.
“It was a weird 20-minute drive home (from the specialist). I had different thoughts and spoke to my wife about how we manage the kids,” Tapping said.
“Initially we thought let’s get all the information and then tell them, so they know, so that was our plan for the first couple of days.
“But then some family knew, then I started to get a couple of calls going “are you ok?”. Then my mate rung me… and goes, “how you are going, I heard you were crook?”.
“I don’t know how it got to that. I thought we’ve got to tell the kids because if Scotty (Dale’s friend) knows on the other side of town, I don’t want the kids on the street doing what they do and someone just mentions in a good way, “how’s dad going, is he alright?” and they go, “what are you talking about?”.”
“It was a tough conversation (and) they took it differently, but I’m glad we did (tell them), because I never would’ve forgiven myself if they’d heard it innocently through a third party.”
Hear more of Dale Tapping’s incredible story and brave battle with Myeloma in the latest episode of the One on One podcast.
Listen to the episode below or via Spotify and Apple Podcasts.
